time: feb 19, 2007 9:51am
|~~ lba ~~||
Tracks lead to corners in either direction. There is a clogged brook beside. Old wood from logging years past. blocking the flow of water. A still, green sediment laden puddle waits for release beside me. The tracks ahead seem fair. Just the same as the tracks behind. No visible difference. There is a dampness to the air. Fog clings to the beard hairs. The undecided drops of dew collect at the tips. Which way. Fall down. Follow the path of least resistence to the ground? or cling on to the hair for moment or so longer.
Two ways to go one precieved to be forward one preceived to be back. Caught like a wheel of balogna between two slices of wonder bread. Mustard and mayo for neighbours. Can't go back thats the way I came. Can't go forwards because it is the same as backwards. Hanging there.
“I ordered my horse to be brought from the stables. The servant did not understand my orders. So I went to the stables myself, saddled my horse, and mounted. In the distance I heard the sound of a trumpet, and I asked the servant what it meant. He knew nothing and had heard nothing. At the gate he stopped me and asked: "Where is the master going?" "I don't know," I said, "just out of here, just out of here. Out of here, nothing else, it's the only way I can reach my goal." "So you know your goal?" he asked. "Yes," I replied, "I've just told you. Out of here--that's my goal."”
The Departure~ Franz Kafka
At the end of the first walk for the “cure from cars” I was deposited in Calgary. I have family there. My Aunt and Uncle were gracious enough to put me up under their ping-pong table. And find me a job. I worked in construction. Concrete Form Building to be exact. Cribbon Builders was the company's name. All that is another story.
After making up a little bundle of cash i set out on what i precieved to be the second stage of “The Cure From Cars.” I bought a kayak from a co-worker for $50 and a half pack of smokes. It was painted with house paint. A pretty lousy job I might add. Not the sturdiest of vessels. It had seen some serious abuse.
I took Sainte-de-terre on a 100km river tour out of Calgary. Prior to leaving on the trip i had been in a kayak for all of 4 hours. My Unkle Gerald gave me a crash course in the art of the Kayak. The trip was doomed from the begining. It was by no means my Unkle's fault. As i was floating past the Calgary city limits sign-- my paddle broke. one of the ends fell off completely. Did i mention that my equipment was less than adequate. I failed to get a picture of the sign as i floated past. Instead i spent the kodak moment, trying to catch a hold of my renegade kayak with a one ended paddle. All the while trying desperately to catch the bit that had fallen off.
The paddle was fixed with duct-tape. I continued on with a frighteningly new understanding of the vessel i had purchased. Past very similar scapes to that of California. There were pelicans, and there was the constant flow of water. There were cows and grassy pastures. The only thing missing was an ocean. Although there were the fields on top of the valley. That was an ocean of sorts.
I called off that trip on Blackfoot Indian Reservation. Outside the town of Cluny AB. Not entirely sure what stopped me. I ran into a similar yesterday though. The only difference between yesterday and then is that i can't just walk 8 kms into town to call my Aunt and Unkle to come pick me up. I had to walk 4 miles to a bus-stop and wait 12 hours for the next bus, i slept for most of the night.
The old kibosh has been put on this current installment of the “Cure from Cars.” I have come to a realization about a particular fact. That there is something wholely unsustainable about what i am doing here. Idealism fuels the feet to pound further, by any means neccessary. With disregard for person and disregard for landscape. All the while falling back on some old vice to chase more ghosts down more nameless roads.
I have finished this walk. I have done what i set out to do. found the next step. I am going to wait a bit to put my foot on it. I am by no means done. The next installment will prove to be better still. I am going to go with a local theme. Its a walk I have been saving for just the right moment, and plenty more sustainable. Estimated time of departure: Fall 07.
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