The Last Of the Lurcho's

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It was in the Spring of 2006 Lurch appeared back in the Yard for yet another battle against the tire piles. the experience was as per usual. mountains of tires to move and sort. Within a few days of Lurch's arrival, a Nissan Pick-up was dropped off. it had the usual rusty underbody, and the clutch was all but gone. Grey and boring. Lacking all lustre and lure. Luckily, Lurch had found some spray paint the day previous. A can of Construction Spray Bomb, some run of the mill dark brown, and grey primer. Withing 15 minutes of Ownership the truck had been given a new paint job, and dubbed "Lurcho Morte."


Quite a nice little truck. Well actually it was garbage thats why it was there. For my purposes it was perfect. I could fit a nice stack of tires on it. The radio worked. the heater worked, no ac though. but that doesn't really matter. Lurch wasn't staying for the sticky summer anyway.

Over the course of the next 3 weeks Lurch customized. Doing a some body detail with a dumpter, and by pushing some poorly parked cars. The original grille was destroyed in dire moment involing a malfuctiontioning hood-latch. A new one was found for replacement. It easily attached with speaker wire. A new fuel filtration unit was installed. well it wasn't new but it was less clogged. A stained nudie girl air freshner was hung from the rearview mirror.



The truck came with some 14" aftermarket wheel. This particular model of Nissan had a variety of wheels that would fit. It wasn't long before Lurch found some 15"ers with some large rubber. 225-70-R15's to be exact. Instead of puting on the full set of boffo fat tires. Lurch opted for using two only on the rear axle. The 14"ers were given a new pair of skins. 185-65-14's. Giving Lurcho-morte the mean-lean look of a muscle car. In one of the remote corners of the front Office Lurch managed to find the baddest-assest hubcaps ever to come out of the esteemed Canadian Tire Flyer.


After a while the Truck started to develop a personality. The clucth became most unengaging. It lost part of its muting system and had developed a harsh gargling idle. It started getting aggressive towards the other yard vehicles. It lost an eye in a battle that broke out between it and a 89 tempo.


Eventual the situation grew from bad to worse. Lurcho-Morte had come to fufill its name. It had to be chained at night. For fear it would run down the night security dogs. Lurcho had developed the evil eye.


Lurcho Morte died from massive hydraulic trauma to the entire body. May 1rst 2006. The only remnant is the grille. It lives on on the wall of lurcho.
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